Get ready to laugh your socks off because we’ve got the best collection of clever puns and jokes about “clever” that will tickle your funny bone! 😂 This list of hilarious wordplay is perfect for kids and adults who appreciate a good dose of humor. Get ready for some positive vibes and groan-worthy jokes that are “clever” in all the right ways! 😉 Let’s jump into a world where intelligence and laughter collide! 🎉
Top Clever Puns & Jokes – Editor’s Picks: Guaranteed to Quip You Up!
- Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
- What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato!
- What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!
- Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole-in-one!
- What’s the best thing about Switzerland? I don’t know, but the flag is a big plus.
- You know what I saw today? Every single thing I looked at.
- What do you call a droid that takes the long way around? An R2-Detour!
- I used to be addicted to soap… but I’m clean now.
- Why don’t they play poker in the jungle? Too many cheetahs!
- Why can’t Monday lift Saturday? It’s a weak day.
- What does oblivious mean? No idea!
- Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two tired!
- What does a nosey pepper do? It gets jalapeño business!
- Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
- What’s red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

Funny Clever One-Liner Jokes: Quick Witticisms to Brighten Your Day
- I used to be addicted to soap, but I’m clean now. 🧼
- What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato! 🦘🥔
- I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She seemed surprised. 🤨
- Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything! ⚛️🤥
- I just got fired from my job at the bank. An apparent blood type mismatch. 🩸🏦
- What’s the best thing about Switzerland? I don’t know, but the flag is a big plus. 🇨🇭➕
- I wondered why the frisbee was getting bigger, then it hit me. 🥏😲
- What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh! 🐠🤭
- I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down! 📕👽
- Why don’t they play poker in the jungle? Too many cheetahs! 🐆🃏
- What does oblivious mean? I have no idea. 🤷♀️🤷♂️
- Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana. ⏳🍌🪰
- I used to be a baker, but I didn’t make enough dough. 🍞💸
- Always borrow money from a pessimist. They won’t expect it back. 💵😔
- Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field! 🌾🏆
QnA Jokes & Puns About Clever: Get Ready to Exercise Your Funny Bone!
- Q: Why did the scarecrow win an award? A: Because he was outstanding in his field! 🌾🏆
- Q: What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A: A pouch potato! 🥔🦘
- Q: What does oblivious mean because I have no idea! A: … 🤔
- Q: Why don’t scientists trust atoms? A: Because they make up everything! ⚛️🤥
- Q: What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A: A carrot! 🥕🦜
- Q: What do you call a bear with no teeth? A: A gummy bear! 🐻🍬
- Q: Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? A: In case he got a hole-in-one! 🏌️♂️👖
- Q: Why don’t they play poker in the jungle? A: Too many cheetahs! 🐆🃏
- Q: Why can’t Monday lift Saturday? A: It’s a weak day. 💪🗓️
- Q: What do you call a droid that takes the long way around? A: An R2-Detour! 🤖🗺️
- Q: What musical instrument is found in the bathroom? A: A tuba toothpaste! 🛁🎶
- Q: How does a penguin build its house? A: Igloos it together! 🐧🏠
- Q: Why is being a pirate so addictive? A: They say once ye lose yer first hand, ye get hooked! 🪝🏴☠️
- Q: Why don’t some couples go to the gym together? A: Because they have a strained relationship! 💪💔
Dad Jokes About Clever: Warning: May Induce Groans (and Giggles)
- You know what’s really clever? Using a thesaurus to sound smart. Just kidding, that’s my secret!
- Someone called me clever the other day. It was the nicest thing anyone’s ever said… out loud.
- My wife says I’m not very clever. I told her, “Don’t be ridiculous, I’m full of clever ideas… they’re just all on vacation right now.”
- I tried to join a club for clever people, but they said I wasn’t smart enough. I told them, “Well, that’s your opinion!”
- My wife asked me to name something that’s clever and green. Apparently, “A thinking tree” wasn’t the right answer.
- How do you know someone is clever but doesn’t want anyone to know? They tell you they’re not very clever.
- I told my doctor I wanted to be more clever. He said, “Take these pills.” So I did, and now I’m a pharmacist!
- Being clever is a lot like being a magician. You gotta be sneaky about it.
- What’s the most clever animal in the ocean? A brain coral.
- I tried to explain to my son the importance of being clever, but it went right over his head.
- What’s the difference between being clever and being wise? Knowing when to keep your mouth shut!
Funny Quotes About Clever: Witty Wisdom for Your Inner Smart Aleck
- “I’m not saying I’m lazy, but I once considered getting a personal assistant just to scroll through Netflix for me.” – Unknown
- “I’m so clever that sometimes I don’t understand a single word of what I am saying.” – Oscar Wilde (with a twist)
- “Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.” – Alan Dundes (a classic!)
- “I’m not always a genius, but when I am, I prefer to be called ‘Your Brilliance.'” – Unknown
- “I’m not sure what’s tighter, my jeans or my grasp on reality.” – Unknown
- “Some people say I’m condescending. That means I talk down to people.” – Steven Wright (perfectly deadpan)
- “I put my phone in airplane mode, but it still hasn’t taken off. What am I doing wrong?” – Unknown
- “The only reason I’m not a millionaire is because my lottery numbers haven’t come up yet. It’s purely strategic.” – Unknown
- “My therapist told me to embrace my mistakes. I’m still holding onto that one from 2008 pretty tightly.” – Unknown
- “I used to be indecisive. Now I’m not so sure.” – Unknown
- “I’m writing a book. I’ve got the page numbers done, so that’s a start.” – Mitch Hedberg (a legend)
- “I’m not arguing, I’m simply explaining why I’m right.” – Unknown
- “I’m not clumsy. The floor just hates me, the tables and chairs are bullies, and the walls get in my way.” – Unknown
- “If I had a dollar for every smart thing you said… I’d probably still be broke, but at least I’d have a dollar.” – Unknown
- “I’m not saying I invented the internet, but I did click on the pop-up window that said, ‘You are the 1 millionth visitor.'” – Unknown
Funny Proverbs & Wise Sayings about Clever: Witty Whispers and Smart-Aleck Sayings
- Early to bed and early to rise makes a person somewhat suspicious of your clever alibi.
- You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make it think outside the stable – that’s a job for a clever donkey.
- The early bird may get the worm, but the clever bird waits for someone to order takeout.
- Don’t count your chickens before they hatch… unless you’ve cleverly trained them to use an abacus.
- Two wrongs don’t make a right, but two clever lefts can get you out of a tight parking spot.
- A penny saved is a penny earned, unless you spent a dollar on that “Get Rich Quick” book for clever investors.
- Honesty is the best policy, but cleverness gets you a better insurance rate.
- Silence is golden, unless you have a killer comeback – then, by all means, be clever.
- An apple a day keeps the doctor away, but a cleverly disguised cookie is way more satisfying.
- A watched pot never boils, but a cleverly rigged one makes popcorn in record time.
- Rome wasn’t built in a day, but they weren’t using a team of cleverly trained beavers either.
- People in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones, but they can set some pretty clever traps.
- Don’t bite the hand that feeds you, unless it belongs to a mime – then use your cleverness to escape unnoticed.
- Good things come to those who wait, but clever people usually find a way to cut the line.
- Laughter is the best medicine, especially when you’re laughing at someone else’s clever misfortune.
Clever Double Entendres Puns: Wordplay So Good, It Has Two Meanings (At Least!)
- I used to be addicted to soap, but I’m clean now. (Clean refers to both hygiene and overcoming addiction)
- The butcher got caught weighing his thumb with the customer’s order. He said he was just trying to make a quick buck. (Buck refers to both a dollar and a male deer)
- Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything! (Make up can mean to invent something and to be the composition of something)
- I wondered why the frisbee was getting bigger, then it hit me. (Hit me refers to a realization and being physically hit)
- The optometrist fell into the lens grinder and made a spectacle of himself. (Spectacle refers to a sight or event and eyeglasses)
- Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana. (The first sentence is a common idiom, the second plays on the literal meaning of “fruit flies”)
- I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down! (Put down can mean to stop reading and to place something down)
- I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She seemed surprised. (Surprised can refer to an emotion and being startled by something unexpected)
- I want to write a book about how to write a book, but I can’t seem to put my thoughts into words. (Put thoughts into words is a figure of speech meaning to express oneself)
- Have you heard about the new corduroy pillows? They’re making headlines! (Headlines can refer to news and the top part of a pillow)
- Why don’t they play poker in the jungle? Too many cheetahs! (Cheetahs can refer to the animal and people who cheat)
- What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato! (Pouch potato plays on the phrase “couch potato”)
- I’m friends with all the ducks in the park; we quack each other up. (Quack each other up uses the duck’s sound for laughter)
- What’s the difference between a poorly dressed man on a unicycle and a well-dressed man on a bicycle? Attire! (Attire refers to clothing and what the men are riding)
- Never discuss infinity with a mathematician. They can go on about it forever. (Go on can mean to talk at length and continue indefinitely)
Recursive Puns About Clever: Prepare for Clever Puns That Are Clever Even About Being Clever
- Why was the clever pun so hard to understand? Because it was too abstract…ract…ract… 🤯
- You know what they say about clever people? They’re always thinking outside the box… outside the box… outside the box… 📦
- How do you measure the intelligence of a clever pun? By its wit-h… wit-h… wit-h…📏
- Why was the clever computer programmer always cold? Because he was always coding in Java… Java… Java… 🥶
- What did the clever grammar enthusiast say about the never-ending sentence? It was a run-on… run-on… run-on… 🗣️
- Why don’t they trust atoms with being clever? Because they make up everything… everything… everything… ⚛️
- What do you call a clever king’s favorite type of music? A sym-phony… phony… phony… 👑🎶
- Why did the clever scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field… in his field… in his field… 🌾
- I tried to explain to my friend why the pun was so clever, but he just didn’t get it… get it… get it… 🤷♂️
- What do you call a clever fish’s favorite type of music? Salmon-tunes… tunes… tunes… 🐟🎶
- Why was the clever detective so good at solving mysteries? Because he could connect the dots… the dots… the dots… 🕵️♀️
- Why don’t scientists trust stairs with being clever? Because they’re always up to something… up to something… up to something… 🪜
- I’m so clever, I could write a recursive pun about being clever… about being clever… about being clever… 😎
Clever Tom Swifties – Jokes and Puns That Will Leave You Saying “Well Played”
- “I need to see the patient in bed 10,” the doctor said wardly.
- I’ve lost my voice,” the singer said hoarsely.
- “This coffee tastes like dirt!” Tom said groundly.
- “I think I’m going to be sick,” Tom said nauseously.
- “This zoo is really smelly,” Tom said zoologically.
- “Make sure that door is secure,” Tom said boltedly.
- “I can cut through metal with my bare hands!” Tom said ironically.
- “I love performing in plays,” Tom said dramatically.
- “That’s my favorite part of the newspaper,” Tom said columnly.
- “Get to the point!” Tom said bluntly.
- “These pancakes are flat,” Tom said flatly.
- “I’m going to win this race,” Tom said confidently.
- “I’ve only got diamonds, clubs, and spades!” Tom said heartlessly.
- “That’s the last time I order anything online!” Tom said defeatedly.
- “These shoes are way too tight,” Tom said narrowly.
- “I won $10! Let’s celebrate!” Tom said triumphantly.
Clever Spoonerisms: Tongue Twisters for the Witty and Quick
- “That’s one smell cubee!” (smart cookie)
- “Don’t be such a clever bic liver!” (clever dick)
- “He’s got a pea-sized rain!” (brain)
- “She’s a real whizz kidney!” (whiz kid)
- “Wow, you’re a regular sight readee!” (bright reader)
- “He’s as sharp as a tack of wards!” (stack of cards)
- “She’s got a real knack for plucking the best hories!” (stories)
- “Don’t be a fart smarty!” (smart arty)
- “He’s definitely the wast briniest in the room!” (brightest)
- “She’s got a mind like a steel crap!” (steel trap)
- “He’s always a few stews ahead!” (steps)
- “She’s a regular word slither!” (wordsmith)
- “He could solve a rubik’s tube in his sleep!” (Rubik’s Cube)
- “Don’t worry, he’s a qualified brain surge!” (brain surgeon)
- “She’s always quick with a witty retorture!” (witty retort)
- “He’s a real whizz with a pun and a craper!” (pen and paper)
- “Well, slap my hand and call me sally, she’s a regular brain drain!” (rain brain)
Pun Intended: That’s All, Folks! 😄
We’ve reached the peak of pun-derfulness! Hopefully, these 150+ clever puns and jokes have left you feeling anything but dense. But don’t stop now, our website is a veritable gold mine of groan-worthy gags and chuckle-inducing wordplay. Explore at your own risk, you might just die laughing… or at least crack a smile. 😉
