150+ Valentine’s Puns & Jokes To Make You LOL 💕

Get ready to laugh your ❤️ out because this Valentine’s Day, we’re serving up a feast of fun with the best puns and jokes about love! This isn’t just some cheesy list of puns (though we have plenty of those too 😂). We’ve got clever jokes for kids, positive humor to share with your sweetheart, and enough hilarious wordplay to make Cupid himself chuckle. Get ready to spread the laughter and love – this Valentine’s Day is about to get punny!

Top Valentines Day Puns & Jokes – Editor’s Picks: Guaranteed to Make You LOL (or at Least Groan)

1. Why did the bee get married on Valentine’s Day? Because he found his honey! 🍯💍
2. What did the ocean say to the beach on Valentine’s Day? Nothing, it just waved! 🌊👋
3. Are you a parking ticket? Because you’ve got fine written all over you. 😉
4. I’m not Fred Flintstone, but I can make your bed rock! 😏
5. You must be Jamaican, because Jamaican me crazy! 🇯🇲🤪
6. Do you have a Band-Aid? Because I scraped my knee falling for you. 🥰🤕
7. I’m like a Rubik’s Cube. The more you play with me, the harder I get. 😏
8. Forget about Spiderman, Superman, and Batman. I’ll be your man. 💪🦸‍♂️
9. You’re so sweet, you’re giving me a toothache! 🍭🦷
10. What do you call a very small Valentine’s Day gift? A centime-nt! 😂💰
11. I love you more than coffee, but please don’t make me prove it. ☕❤️
12. You’re the cheese to my macaroni. We’re simply meant to be! 🧀🍝
13. I must be a photographer, because I can picture us together forever. 📸❤️
14. I’m not a hoarder, but I really want to keep you forever. 😉📦
15. If you were a vegetable, you’d be a cute-cumber!🥒🥰
16. Is your name Google? Because you have everything I’ve been searching for. 😉🔍❤️

Funny Valentines Day One-Liner Jokes: Because Love Shouldn’t Be So Serious

1. I love you more than chocolate, but please don’t make me prove it. 🍫
2. You’re looking sharp today. Just like Cupid’s arrow… which reminds me, watch out! 😉
3. Are you a parking ticket? Because you’ve got fine written all over you. 😏
4. I’m not a hoarder, but I really want to keep you forever. 🥰
5. You must be a high test score because I want to take you home and show you to my mother. 🤓
6. Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again? 😉
7. I’m so cheesy for you, it’s embarrassing. Like, cheddar-ing you level of embarrassing. 🧀
8. Is your name Google? Because you have everything I’ve been searching for. 😉
9. If you were a vegetable, you’d be a cute-cumber. 🥰
10. I don’t need Twitter, I’m already following you. 😎
11. Besides being gorgeous, what do you do for a living? 😉
12. Forget the butterflies, I feel the whole zoo when I’m with you! 🐘🦒🐒
13. You must be Jamaican, because Jamaican me crazy. 🇯🇲
14. Do you like raisins? How do you feel about a date? 😏
15. Our love is like a fine wine, it just gets better with age… or so I tell myself as I forget our anniversary. 🍷 😅
16. You’re my favorite distraction. Now kiss me! 😘

QnA Jokes & Puns about Valentines Day: Get Your Laugh On This February 14th

1. Q: What did the calculator say to the Valentine’s Day card? A: “You can count on me!”
2. Q: Why did the Valentine’s Day card get sent to the glue factory? A: It needed to get stuck on someone!
3. Q: What do you call a very small Valentine’s Day gift? A: A centi-mental present!
4. Q: What did the stamp say to the Valentine’s Day letter? A: “Stick with me, we’re headed to a love-ly place!”
5. Q: What did the bee say to his Valentine? A: “Honey, you’re the bee’s knees!”
6. Q: What do you call two birds in love? A: Tweethearts!
7. Q: Why is Valentine’s Day great for restaurants? A: Because it’s when love is truly in the air… and reservations are booked solid!
8. Q: What did the light bulb say to his Valentine? A: “I love you watts and watts!”
9. Q: What did the nervous gardener give his Valentine? A: A sweet pea-on!
10. Q: What did the boy sheep say to the girl sheep on Valentine’s Day? A: “I love ewe!”
11. Q: What happens when you fall in love with a pastry chef? A: You get dessert every night!
12. Q: Why did the smartphone and the laptop break up on Valentine’s Day? A: They couldn’t see eye to eye.
13. Q: What do squirrels give each other for Valentine’s Day? A: Forget-me-nuts!
14. Q: Why did Cupid get a job at the restaurant? A: He was good at making reservations for two.
15. Q: What do farmers give their wives for Valentine’s Day? A: Hogs and kisses!
16. Q: What did the octopus say to his Valentine? A: “I love you with all my heart…and all my tentacles!”
17. Q: How do single people wish each other a Happy Valentine’s Day? A: Happy Singles Awareness Day!

Dad Jokes about Valentine’s Day: Get Ready to Groan (and Secretly Smile)

1. I’m making a Valentine’s Day card with a picture of a puppy on it. It’s addressed “To the most a-dog-able person I know!”
2. What did the stamp say to the Valentine’s Day card? Stick with me, we’re going places!
3. What did the light bulb say to the Valentine’s Day card? I’m lit about you!
4. I was going to buy my Valentine some flowers, but then I thought, “Hey, I can get her a pizza shaped like a heart for half the price!”
5. Why did the Valentine’s Day card get sent to the hospital? It had too many cheesy pickup lines!
6. What do you call a very small Valentine’s Day gift? A centime-nt!
7. You must be a high test score because I want to take you home and show you to my mother.
8. I love you more than coffee… but please don’t make me prove it.
9. I tried to think of the most Valentine-y gift I could get you… but you already have my heart. (Winks clumsily)
10. What do you call it when someone steals your date on Valentine’s Day? A “robbery” mance!
11. I know Valentine’s Day is a big deal, but don’t worry, I’m not expecting a Tesla or anything.
12. What’s the best thing about Valentine’s Day candy hearts? You can eat your words!
13. Why do couples go to the gym on Valentine’s Day? Because they want their love to work out!
14. I wanted to get you chocolate for Valentine’s Day, but I ate it all on the way home. Sorry, not sorry!
15. What did the calculator say to the Valentine’s Day card? You can count on me!
16. Why is Valentine’s Day so great for restaurants? Because it’s the one day everyone wants to order the “couple’s special”!
17. Your Valentine’s Day gift is me. You’re welcome! (Flexes awkwardly)

Funny Quotes about Valentines Day: Get Your Giggles On This February 14th

1. “Valentine’s Day: The only day I’m thankful I have a dog, so I can legitimately say I’m spending it with someone I love.”
2. “Roses are red, violets are blue, if you were a chicken, I’d totally eat you.” (For that special someone with a dark sense of humor…)
3. “Cupid called. He wants his arrow back. He says it wasn’t meant for your knee.”
4. “Forget Valentine’s Day. I’m spending the day with my true love: Netflix and sweatpants.”
5. “Valentine’s Day is just a commercial holiday that promotes overpriced greeting cards and unrealistic expectations.” – Dwight Schrute, The Office (Okay, so maybe you already knew this one, but it’s classic!)
6. “I love you more than coffee, but please don’t make me prove it.”
7. “Valentine’s Day is easy for men. They only have to remember one day. Women have to remember to remind them.”
8. “To my Valentine: I’m yours. No refunds or exchanges.”
9. “What did the calendar say to Valentine’s Day? “I’m booked.”
10. “Today is Valentine’s Day. Or, as men like to call it, “Extortion Day.”
11. “Love is grand; divorce is a hundred grand.”
12. “Single and ready to get nervous around anyone holding a heart-shaped box of chocolates.”
13. “Happy Valentine’s Day from the one who puts up with you the other 364 days of the year.”
14. “If you love something, let it go. If your significant other comes back with expensive jewelry, they were always yours. Happy Valentine’s Day!”
15. “Don’t worry, be happy. And by ‘be happy,’ I mean ‘have chocolate.'”

Funny Proverbs & Wise Sayings about Valentines Day: Guaranteed to Make You Cupid Snort

1. The course of true love is paved with expired coupons. (Because let’s be real, Valentine’s Day deals are a thing).
2. A rose by any other name would still be cheaper in bulk. (Especially after February 14th).
3. Don’t cry over spilled milk, cry over forgotten Valentine’s Day reservations. (Because those are way harder to get last minute).
4. Early to bed and early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy, and likely to remember Valentine’s Day. (Pro tip: set an alarm).
5. You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make it appreciate a heart-shaped box of chocolates. (Unless it’s filled with hay, maybe).
6. The apple of my eye? More like the entire chocolate factory. (Go big or go home, right?).
7. Love is blind, but it’s got a really good sense of smell. Don’t forget the flowers. (Seriously, don’t be that person).
8. A penny saved is a penny earned, but a grand gesture on Valentine’s Day? Priceless. (Just kidding… kinda).
9. An apple a day keeps the doctor away, but a box of chocolates says “I love you” way faster. (Sometimes, you gotta indulge).
10. Don’t put all your eggs in one basket? Please, on Valentine’s Day, make it a dozen red roses. (Because sometimes, more IS more).
11. You can’t judge a book by its cover, but a thoughtful Valentine’s Day gift speaks volumes. (It’s the thought that counts, but a little effort goes a long way).
12. Patience is a virtue, especially when waiting for your significant other to pick a restaurant on Valentine’s Day. (Just pick a place, people!).
13. Two wrongs don’t make a right, but two desserts on Valentine’s Day definitely do. (Calories don’t count on holidays, right?).
14. Good things come to those who wait, but great Valentine’s Day gifts are usually pre-ordered. (Don’t procrastinate on love).
15. Laughter is the best medicine, especially after a disastrous Valentine’s Day date. (Hey, at least you have a good story now).
16. Actions speak louder than words, but a heartfelt Valentine’s Day card never hurts. (Unless it’s one of those singing ones. Those are terrifying).
17. Love conquers all, even overpriced prix fixe menus and crowded restaurants on Valentine’s Day. (Because love finds a way, even if it involves takeout and a movie marathon).

Valentines Day Double Entendres Puns: Get Your Mind Out of the Gutter (and Onto Some Sweet Wordplay)

1. “I’m really attracted to you. Like, REALLY attracted to you.” (Playing on both emotional attraction and the physics of attraction).
2. “You make my heart race… to the bedroom.” (Combining expressions of love with a suggestive ending).
3. “I’m nuts about you. Cashews about you, too.” (A silly play on being “crazy” for someone).
4. “Are you a parking ticket? Because you’ve got fine written all over you.” (A classic pick-up line with a Valentine’s twist).
5. “I’m whipped. Want some cream with that?” (A cheeky reference to being “whipped” in a relationship).
6. “Let’s get lucky. I’ve got a four-leaf clover and a rabbit’s foot.” (Humorous take on hoping for a physically intimate night).
7. “You must be a high test score because I want to take you home and show you to my mother.” (Flipping the script on a traditional “good partner” trait).
8. “You’re so sweet, you’re giving me a toothache. Good thing I brought my toothbrush.” (Suggestive with a wink and a nod).
9. “I’m like a Rubik’s Cube; the more you play with me, the harder I get.” (A bold and playful double entendre).
10. “Are you a photographer? Because I can picture us together forever.” (Classic line with a suggestive “picture” implication).
11. “Let’s Netflix and chill…out because I made a reservation at your favorite restaurant.” (Playing with the popular phrase while offering a classy alternative).
12. “I’m not Fred Flintstone, but I can make your bed rock.” (A punny and slightly naughty promise of a good time).
13. “Are you a broom? Because you swept me off my feet… and now I’m waiting for you to take me home.” (Combining a sweet sentiment with a suggestive ending).

Recursive Puns about Valentines Day: Because One Level of Wordplay Just Isn’t Enough

1. Why did the recursive function break up on Valentine’s Day? Because it couldn’t find its base case! (Get it? Because it keeps going and going… just like a relationship should?)
2. What’s a programmer’s favorite Valentine’s Day candy? A recursive chocolate heart! It’s heart-shaped chocolate… filled with more heart-shaped chocolate… filled with (you guessed it!) more heart-shaped chocolate!
3. Why did the Valentine’s Day card get lost in the mail? Because it kept getting returned to sender… who returned it to sender… who returned it to sender… (You get the picture, right? Love can be complicated!)
4. I love you more than you can imagine. In fact, I love you more than I love you more than you can imagine. In fact, I love you more than… (Okay, I’m getting a little carried away, but you get the idea!)
5. Roses are red, violets are blue, this Valentine’s pun is recursive, and so is my love for you! Roses are red, violets are blue, this Valentine’s pun is recursive, and so is my love for you! Roses are red… (Okay, I’ll stop. Maybe.)
6. This Valentine’s Day, let’s get lost in a recursive loop of love, laughter, and endless cuddles! This Valentine’s Day, let’s get lost in a recursive loop of love, laughter, and endless cuddles! This Valentine’s Day… (You know the drill!)
7. I’m so happy we’re together, it feels like a dream! I’m so happy we’re together, it feels like a dream! I’m so happy… (Wait, are we dreaming right now? Because this feels pretty real to me!)
8. My love for you is like a recursive function: It has a base case (our first date), and it keeps growing with each passing moment! (And like a well-written function, it’s efficient, elegant, and always returns a positive result!)
9. You’re the peanut butter to my recursive chocolate heart: You complete me in a way that’s both delicious and endlessly satisfying! (Plus, we go together like two things that go together really well!)
10. This Valentine’s Day, let’s write our own love story… This Valentine’s Day, let’s write our own love story… This Valentine’s Day… (And let’s make sure it has a happy ending… that just keeps on ending… happily!)
11. You make my heart race faster than a recursive loop trying to find its base case! You make my heart race faster than a recursive loop trying to find its base case! You make my heart… (Okay, I need to catch my breath. Love does that to you!)
12. What did the binary code say to its Valentine? “I love you 101010… which is the same as saying I love you 101010… which is the same as…” (You know the rest!)
13. This Valentine’s Day, I promise to love you more than words can express… This Valentine’s Day, I promise to love you more than words can express… This Valentine’s Day… (Because sometimes, actions speak louder than recursively repeating yourself!)

Funny Valentines Day Tom Swifties – Jokes and Puns to Make Your Heart Skip a Beat

1. “I think my date went well,” Tom said charmingly.
2. “Be my Valentine,” Tom said cardinally.
3. “You’re the only one for me,” Tom said singularly.
4. “I love you more than words can say,” Tom uttered sweetly.
5. “This chocolate is divine!” Tom exclaimed richly.
6. “I’m so happy you’re my Valentine,” Tom beamed radiantly.
7. “Did you get my love letter?” Tom asked missively.
8. “I bought you a dozen roses,” Tom said florally.
9. “I think I broke the vase,” Tom said sheepishly.
10. “I can’t wait to give you this diamond ring,” Tom said engagingly.
11. “I love sharing a milkshake with you,” Tom said strawly.
12. “Will you be my Valentine?” Tom asked tentatively.
13. “I’ll always love you,” Tom promised eternally.
14. “I got you a heart-shaped box of chocolates,” Tom said lovingly.
15. “Your love makes my heart flutter,” Tom said butterfly.
16. “I arrow-sly snuck an extra Valentine’s card into your bag,” Tom said quiveringly.
17. “Will you accept this rose?” Tom asked witheringly.

Spoonerisms to Make Your Valentine Say “You’ve Wot to Be Choking!” – Valentines Day Spoonerisms

1. Wine and dine me? ➡️ Dine and whine me? (Sounds like a recipe for a terrible date!)
2. You’re the pear of my heart! ➡️ You’re the rear of my part! (Anatomically questionable declarations of love!)
3. I’m smitten with loove! ➡️ I’m smitten with woove! (Perhaps they’re a fan of textiles?)
4. Let’s share a romantic heat. ➡️ Let’s share a romantic sheet! (Practicality is romantic, right?)
5. Happy Valentime’s Shay! ➡️ Happy Shalentime’s Vay! (Just a couple of gibberish-loving sweethearts!)
6. Will you be my Valentide’s Bay? ➡️ Will you be my Balentide’s Vay? (Another linguistic masterpiece for your sweetheart.)
7. He’s such a cute hud! ➡️ He’s such a cute dud! (Maybe reassess that crush?)
8. She’s a real heart throbber! ➡️ She’s a real art throbber! (Guessing museums are the way to her heart?)
9. Cupid shot me with his bow and narrow! ➡️ Cupid shot me with his boe and n’arrow! (Sounds like Cupid needs archery lessons.)
10. I love you more than words can shay! ➡️ I love you more than words can say! (Wait, that one’s actually correct! …Or is it?)
11. You’re the best boo I know! ➡️ You’re the best zoo I know! (High praise with a slightly wild undertone.)
12. My love for you burns with the heat of a tousand suns! ➡️ My love for you burns with the heat of a sousand tuns! (That’s a lot of…tuna?)
13. You make my heart go flitter patter! ➡️ You make my heart go bitter fatter! (Love: the ultimate cardio workout?)
14. I’ve got a crush on you, sho big! ➡️ I’ve got a crush on you, so chig! ( Declarations of love can be tough to understand, okay?)
15. Be my Valentine, you silly goose! ➡️ Be my Balentine, you silly coose! (Who needs doves when you can have cows for Valentine’s Day?)
16. Tonight’s the might for romance! ➡️ Tonight’s the right for momance! (Because every mom deserves a little love, too.)

Pun Intended: That’s All, Folks! 😂

We hope these Valentine’s Day puns and jokes left you feeling anything but “pun”-ished! If you’re still hungry for more laughs (and let’s be honest, who isn’t?), be sure to browse the rest of our punny website. We’ve got enough jokes to make you laugh your heart out, even if your Valentine’s Day plans are on the rocks!

About the Author: Sarah Ejaz

I, Sarah Ejaz, am the creative force behind ThePunnyWorld.com, your premier destination for chuckles and chortles. With my expertise in English Literature and extensive experience as a freelance creative writer, I craft jokes and puns that light up your day. Explore our world for your daily dose of humor, and let the good times roll! Find and read here my Best Puns.

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