π Hey there, ink-lovers! (And those who just love a good laugh π). Getting a tattoo is a big decision β youβre basically signing up for a lifetime of explaining that, no, your mom isnβt disappointed. π
So, before you get inked with the βbestβ (π) decision of your life, weβve compiled a list of tattoo puns and jokes that are sure to tickle your funny bone. This list has it all: clever wordplay, puns for kids, and humor thatβs guaranteed to put a smile on your face. Get ready to laugh your tats off! π€£
Top Tattoo Puns & Jokes That Will Inkredibly Tickle Your Funny Bone
- I got a tattoo of an apostrophe yesterdayβ¦ now itβs just a matter of finding the right place to put it.
- My friend got a tattoo of a dollar sign on his footβ¦ he calls it his βsoleβ purpose in life.
- Why did the tattoo artist refuse to tattoo the number seven on the football player? Because he was booked solid.
- I got a tattoo of a dictionary on my armβ¦ Itβs my go-to for spelling bee competitions and awkward social situations.
- What do you call a tattoo on a mimeβs face? A silent scream for attention.
- My friend said his new tattoo was a real conversation starter⦠Turns out it was just misspelled.
- I got a tattoo of a snail going really fast on my backβ¦ I guess you could say itβs my escargot-away driver.
- I saw a guy with a tattoo that said βLife is a beachββ¦ He looked really tan, but also extremely sunburned and dehydrated. Seemed ironic.
- Why did the chameleon regret getting a tattoo? It kept changing its mind!
- I told the tattoo artist I wanted a tattoo of a broken heartβ¦ He said, βDonβt worry, Iβm sure itβll heal.β
- Someone offered me a free tattoo if I could guess what it was. It was a Sharpie. I won that one fair and square.
- Why donβt mimes get tattoos? Because itβd be like drawing on the walls!
- Whatβs the difference between a tattoo and a tax? You donβt have to wait for a tattoo to hurt to know itβs permanent.
- My friend got a tattoo of a pretzelβ¦ Heβs really salty about it.
Tattoo-tally Hilarious One-Liner Jokes
- Iβm thinking of getting a tattoo that says βloadingβ¦β on my forehead. Iβm just waiting for the right font.
- My friend got a tattoo of a boomerang. Heβs thrown off ever since.
- I saw a guy with a tattoo of a dictionary on his arm. I thought, βThatβs a novel idea!β
- I wanted a tattoo of all the places Iβve traveled, but my back has too much baggage already.
- My dad told me not to get any tattoos because theyβre permanent. I told him so is him being my dad, but we donβt see me complaining.
- I got a tattoo artist to draw a tattoo on a piece of paper for me. I guess you could say itβs a rough draft.
- I once met a guy with a βNo Regertsβ tattoo. I wonder what he was thinkingβ¦ or if he was.
- My tattoo artist said my skin was like a canvas. I told him to charge me by the square inch then!
- Apparently, getting a tattoo of your exβs name is bad luck. Who knew? Besides everyone.
- I got a tattoo of a dollar sign on my foot. Now I can literally say I got paid to walk all over people.
- My new tattoo is invisible to the naked eye. Iβll tell you what it is when you get to know me better.
- I just got a tattoo of a semicolon. Itβs a constant reminder that my story isnβt over yet; neither is this sentence.
- You know youβre running out of space for tattoos when you have to start asking people, βCan I see your ankles real quick?β
- Always go to a tattoo artist whoβs had a few bad relationships. They know all about covering up exesβ names.
- I want to open a tattoo shop next door to a gym and call it βRegrets and Iron.β
Quotes About Tattoo That Donβt Ink-lude Regrets π
- βMy tattoo is in a language I donβt even understand. Itβs like a permanent subtweet to my future self.β
- βTattoos: proof that you can cry your way into a good decision.β
- βGetting a tattoo is easy. Explaining it to your grandma, now thatβs the real commitment.β
- βBefore you judge my tattoos, think of it this way β at least my art stays on the canvas.β
- βLife is too short for boring skin. Get a tattoo, or at least doodle on yourself with a Sharpie.β
- βYes, it hurt. But have you ever felt this cool?β gestures vaguely at tattoo
- βMy therapist says my tattoos are a healthy coping mechanism. Now, if I could just find a way to cope with my therapistβs billsβ¦β
- βI donβt have a tattoo bucket list, I have a tattoo βas-the-mood-strikes-and-I-can-afford-itβ scroll.β
- βPeople always ask if I regret any of my tattoos. The answer is yes, but only the one that says βNo Regertsβ.β
- βMy tattoos tell a story. Mostly about how much I love bad decisions and impulse control issues.β
- βTattoos are like potato chips. You canβt have just one. Unless itβs a portrait of your ex, then definitely stick to one.β
- βMy ideal retirement plan involves sitting on a porch, telling exaggerated stories about my tattoos, and charging tourists $5 for pictures.β
- βI like to think of my tattoos as conversation starters. That, or really elaborate mosquito bites.β
- βSure, I could write a memoir. Or I could just show you my arm, itβs basically the same thing.β
- βTattoos: because lifeβs too short to be a blank canvas. Also, because I lost a bet.β
Dad Jokes About Tattoo: Inkinβ Your Funny Bone
- I saw a guy with a tattoo of the alphabet on his skin. I thought, βThatβs pretty basic.β
- My son asked for a tattoo for his birthday. I said, βSure, letβs get you a temporary one.β He said, βCome on, Dad, those arenβt real tattoos!β I said, βNeither are you until youβre 18!β
- Why donβt scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything! Including tattoos, apparently.
- You know whatβs a bad place to get a tattoo? Your skin. Itβs just asking for trouble.
- My wife got a tattoo of a seashell on her wrist. Now she has a permanent reminder of our shell-abration. Get it?
- A guy told me his tattoo was just a phase. I said, βYeah, a solid, permanent phase.β
- Why did the tattoo artist quit their job? They just didnβt like being inked to a desk all day.
- What do you call a tattoo thatβs always under the weather? An inka-sneeze!
- My kid asked me how much tattoos hurt. I told him, βEverything hurts when itβs permanent.β
- What do you call a tattoo of a cow? An udder disaster!
- I saw a guy with a tattoo of a dictionary. I thought, βHe must be a man of many wordsβ¦ permanently.β
- Why donβt zombies get tattoos? They only like βfreshβ ink.
- My son asked for a tattoo of his favorite superhero. I said, βHoney, you already have a SUPER heroβ¦ your Dad!β
- I wanted to get a tattoo of a boomerang, but I changed my mind. I figured it would just come back to haunt me.
- Whatβs the most dedicated insect? The tattoo artistβs bee β always working on the needle.
Tattoo-riffic Puns & Jokes for Kids (Who Think Ink Is Funny!)
- What did the tattoo artist say to the fidgety octopus? βHold still, or youβll get an eight-tacled tattoo!β
- Why did the bear get a tattoo on his stomach? He wanted to be a belly button bear!
- Where do sheep go to get tattoos? The baa-ber shop!
- What do you call a tattoo artist who only uses invisible ink? A very bad idea!
- Why did the robot get a tattoo of a light bulb? He wanted to be a bright spark!
- What happens when a dinosaur gets a tattoo? Itβs dino-mite!
- What do you call a tattoo on a pirateβs foot? An ink-redible sole!
- Why did the tree get a tattoo? It wanted to branch out!
- Why did the ghost get a tattoo? He wanted to be a boo-tiful sight!
- What did the ocean say to the tattoo artist? βJust make me ink-redible!β
- Why did the cookie get a tattoo? He wanted to be a tough cookie!
- What do you call a bear with a tattoo of a fish? A tat-tuna bear!
- Why did the pencil get a tattoo? He wanted to make his mark!
- Where do bees get tattoos? At the sting parlor!
- Whatβs a tattoo artistβs favorite fruit? A perma-peach!
Tattoo-riffic Double Entendres Puns That Will Ink Your Funny Bone
- I wanted a tattoo of a scroll on my arm, but the artist said it would be parchment-ly permanent.
- My tattoo artist is so talented, he can draw a crowd⦠permanently.
- I got a tattoo of a snail because I wanted to shell-ebrate my slow and steady approach to life.
- My dad was furious when he found out I got a tattoo. He really inked my hide.
- I tried to get a discount on my tattoo by saying it was for charity. The artist just gave me a hard ink-quiry.
- I got a tattoo of a dictionary on my arm. Now Iβm covered in definitions of cool.
- I asked for a camouflage tattoo. When I went back to complain that I couldnβt find it, the artist said, βExactly!β
- They say love is pain, which is why I got a tattoo of my ex on my foot so I can kick myself every time I think about her.
- Getting a tattoo of a dollar sign is the only way to ensure youβll always have moneyβ¦ at least in a metaphorical sense.
- My tattoo artist is so good, he doesnβt need stencils, he draws freehandβ¦permanently.
- Iβm starting a band called βThe Regretfuls.β Weβre all about bad decisions and questionable tattoos.
- My tattoo of a semicolon is a constant reminderβ¦ that my grammar isnβt finished yet.
- I got a tattoo of a dot because Iβm a minimalistβ¦ or I just really like punctuation.
- My new tattoo of a world map is incredibly detailed. I can literally pinpoint all my travel plansβ¦and regrets.
- My friend said my new tattoo of a bee was βthe beeβs knees.β I told him, βNo, these are my knees.β
Tattoo-tally Hilarious Tattoo Recursive Puns
- I told my friend his new tattoo of a dictionary was redundant. He said, βI get it, itβs a tattoo about tattoos.β
- This tattoo artist is so meta, he gave me a tattoo of him giving me a tattoo of a tattoo.
- My tattoo artist said my skin was like a canvas. I told him, βDonβt canvas my opinion, just tattoo my tattoo.β
- I tried to tell my friend a joke about his new tattoo, but he stopped me and said, βDude, your tattoo puns are inked permanently in my mind. Iβve heard them all.β
- Getting a tattoo can be a painful experience, but the pain is temporary, and the tattoo is forever. Unless you get a tattoo of the word βtemporary.β
- My tattoo artist is so good, he could tattoo the word βtattooβ onto a grain of rice. I asked him to prove it, but he said, βThatβs a rice-diculous request.β
- This tattoo artist is so talented, he can draw a perfect circle freehand. I asked him to tattoo one on my arm, but he said, βSorry, I only do tattoos that are permanently on point.β
- I went to a tattoo parlor that specializes in ironic tattoos. I got a tattoo that says, βThis tattoo is not ironic.β
- You know what they say about people with tattoos? Theyβre more likely to get another tattoo. Especially if itβs a tattoo of the phrase βmore likely to get another tattoo.β
- My friend got a tattoo of a semicolon on his wrist. I asked him what it meant, and he said, βItβs a reminder that my story isnβt over yet; thereβs more to be inked.β
- I saw a guy with a tattoo that said, βThis is my last tattoo.β I couldnβt help but wonder if he regretted getting that tattoo.
- Some people say tattoos are a form of self-expression. Others say theyβre just permanent reminders of bad decisions. I say, why not get a tattoo of that debate inked on your body?
- My friend asked if I regretted any of my tattoos. I told him, βI donβt regret any of them, especially not the one that says βNo Regertsβ.β
- Iβm thinking about getting a tattoo of a blank sheet of paper. That way, if I ever change my mind about a tattoo, I can just get it inked over.
- What did the tattoo say to the laser removal machine? βI thought we had something special, something permanent!β
Tattoo Q&A Jokes & Puns So Funny Theyβll Ink Your Brain
- Q: Why did the tattoo artist win an award? A: He was outstanding in his field!
- Q: What do you call a tattoo thatβs always in trouble? A: A permanent marker.
- Q: Why did the tattoo of the eye cry? A: It was inked in a sad story.
- Q: What did the tattoo say to the skin? A: Donβt worry, this is going to be ink-credible!
- Q: Where do tattoos sleep? A: Under your skin!
- Q: Why did the tattoo artist refuse to give the vampire a tattoo? A: He said it wouldnβt stick!
- Q: How do you make a tattoo about a pirate ship disappear? A: Use the Vanish Point Ointment!
- Q: What did the left arm say to the right arm about the new tattoo? A: Have you seen this new ink? Itβs totally arm candy!
- Q: Why was the tattoo artist so broke? A: He was always drawing blanks.
- Q: What do you call a tattoo of a snail? A: A slow-motion picture!
- Q: Whatβs the most detailed tattoo? A: A fine print!
- Q: How did the tattoo pay for his groceries? A: He used his ink-come!
- Q: Whatβs a dragonβs favorite tattoo? A: A fire-breathing sale!
- Q: Whatβs the best thing about getting a tattoo of a clock? A: Itβs time-less!
- Q: Why shouldnβt you get a tattoo when youβre tired? A: You might nod off!
Tattoo-rific Knock-Knock Jokes That Will Leave You Inking In Laughter
- Knock knock! Whoβs there? Tattoo. Tattoo who? Tattoo bad you donβt find my jokes funny, Iβm inked-redible!
- Knock knock! Whoβs there? Tattoo. Tattoo who? Tattoo soon to tell, youβll have to wait and hear the punchline.
- Knock knock! Whoβs there? Tattoo. Tattoo who? Iβm feeling a little tattoo edgy for you to answer.
- Knock knock! Whoβs there? Tattoo. Tattoo who? Tattoo much pressure to be funny! I need a break.
- Knock knock! Whoβs there? Tattoo. Tattoo who? Tattoo the rescue, my jokes are starting to needle me!
- Knock knock! Whoβs there? Tattoo. Tattoo who? Iβm so funny, I should get a trophy tattoo-ed on me!
- Knock knock! Whoβs there? Tattoo. Tattoo who? Iβm not a mind reader, tattoo you think I know whoβs there?
- Knock knock! Whoβs there? Tattoo. Tattoo who? Aw, youβre just joshing me, you canβt resist my tattoo-tally awesome jokes!
- Knock knock! Whoβs there? Tattoo. Tattoo who? Tattoo be or tattoo not be funny, that is the question!
- Knock knock! Whoβs there? Tattoo. Tattoo who? Alright, alright, Iβll stop with the tattoo punsβ¦ for now.
- Knock knock! Whoβs there? Tattoo. Tattoo who? These jokes are permanently etched in your mind, admit it!
- Knock knock! Whoβs there? Tattoo. Tattoo who? You think these jokes are bad? You should see my stand-up tattoo-tine!
- Knock knock! Whoβs there? Tattoo. Tattoo who? I heard you like tattoos, so I put a joke in this knock-knock joke!
- Knock knock! Whoβs there? Tattoo. Tattoo who? Donβt get your ink in a twist, thereβs plenty more jokes where that came from!
Tattoo Pun Names That Will Inkspire You to Giggle
- Ink-redible Hulk
- Tattooine Raider
- The Perman Ink-quisition
- Skin-ful Secrets Tattoo Parlor
- Sir Inks-a-lot
- The Ink-Spector
- The Dermistician
- The Artful Dodger (specializes in escape route tattoos)
- Pain-cess Bride (known for intricate, large-scale work)
- Professor Inkwell
- The Needle and the Dame Tattoo
- Tattool Tales (a gossip blog about tattoo mishaps)
- Ink-cognito (for undercover tattoo artists or those getting secret tattoos)
- The Skin-tillating Saga of Sir Reginald Tattoo III
- Permanently Scarred⦠For Life! (a dark humor tattoo parlor)
Ink-redible Puns: Thatβs All, Folks!
Well, there you have it, folks! Enough ink-redible puns and tattoos jokes to make you laugh your tat-tooshie off. But the fun doesnβt have to stop here! Explore our website for more punny delights that will leave you permanently smiling. Donβt worry, we promise theyβre less painful than a real tattooβ¦unless you count the sore sides from laughing too hard!