Get ready to laugh your apples off! 🍎😂 This list of apple puns and jokes is the best way to bring some humor to your day. From clever puns to jokes that are perfect for kids, we’ve got all the funny apple-themed humor you could ever want. So grab a snack (maybe even a delicious apple!), get comfy, and get ready for a bushel of laughs with these positive and hilarious puns and jokes about apples! 😄🍏

Top Apple Puns & Jokes – Editor’s Picks: Guaranteed to Make You Laugh, Not Byte

  1. Why did the iPhone go to the doctor? Because it wasn’t peeling well!
  2. What does a tech-savvy farmer grow? Pineapples!
  3. What did the Apple say to the Orange? “Hey! Quit copying me!”
  4. How does an Apple Watch propose? It gets down on one app!
  5. What did the detective say when he found the missing Apple product? “Case closed!”
  6. What do you call a sad strawberry? A blueberry. What do you call a happy blueberry? A blackberry. What do you call a blackberry that works at Apple? A Genius!
  7. Why can’t the orange win an argument with the apple? Because the apple has all the arguments!
  8. I tried to explain to my friend how expensive new iPhones are… It went over his head.
  9. What’s it called when an apple takes over a kingdom? A fruit coup!
  10. What’s an apple’s favorite app? Find My Friends!
  11. Did you hear about the iCar? It had a really bad signal until it drove into the Apple store!
  12. I just got fired from my job at the Apple factory. Apparently, I had a bad “core” performance review.
  13. I saw a sign that said: “Watch for children.” I thought, that’s strange. Who’s watching them? An Apple Watch?
  14. Why did the apple go on a date with the prune? Because he couldn’t find a date!
  15. My friend said his iPhone is water-resistant. I told him that’s cool, but my blender is apple-resistant.
  16. Why don’t they allow fruits in computer labs? Because they’re afraid of a byte!
  17. How do you make apple juice? You give it a good push!
Clean and clever Apple Puns and Jokes at ThePunnyWorld.com. Discover the best Apple, featuring top Apple jokes, one-liners, funny quotes, and captions. Enjoy a collection of funny and clever Apple content designed for humor enthusiasts.

Funny Apple One-Liner Jokes That Will Make You Chuckle

  1. I tried to make apple juice from concentrate, but I couldn’t focus.
  2. Did you hear about the apple that went on a diet? It’s now a pineapple.
  3. What does an apple do when it blushes? It turns a little cider.
  4. Why did the apple go out with the prune? Because he couldn’t find a date.
  5. I threw an apple at a guy yesterday… luckily, I missed the core.
  6. You know what they say about apple seeds… they’re the core of the issue.
  7. What do you call an apple that plays the trumpet? A tooty fruity!
  8. An apple a day keeps the doctor away… especially if you aim well.
  9. My friend tried to convince me that apples grow underground. I told him, “You’re barking up the wrong tree!”
  10. Why did the apple get detention? It kept falling asleep in class!
  11. What’s worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm.
  12. I saw a sign that said “Watch for Apples.” I thought, “How do they watch anything without eyes?”
  13. Never take advice from an apple. They have no core values.
  14. What’s an apple’s favorite type of music? Anything but heavy metal.
  15. Why did the teacher bring apples to school? She wanted to teach her students about core subjects.
  16. I tried to catch some fog earlier. I mist.
  17. They said I could be anything, so I became an apple. Now I’m sad… I really wanted to be an orange.

QnA Jokes & Puns about Apple: Gettin’ Fruity with the Apple of Our Eye

  1. Q: Why did the apple go out with the prune? A: Because he couldn’t find a date!
  2. Q: What does an Apple employee use to fix a broken Apple product? A: Apple juice!
  3. Q: Why did the iPhone go to the doctor? A: It had a bad app-endicitis!
  4. Q: Why did Apple decide to make phones? A: They heard Samsung was making a killing!
  5. Q: What’s an Apple product’s favorite school subject? A: i-Geometry!
  6. Q: Why can’t you tell a secret on an Apple farm? A: Too many iPads!
  7. Q: How does an iWatch pay for things? A: With Apple Pay, silly!
  8. Q: What do you call a line of Apple fans outside a locked Apple store? A: An iQueue!
  9. Q: What’s red, bad for your teeth, and sounds like a bell? A: An apple ring-tone!
  10. Q: Why was the iPhone XR feeling sad? A: Because it wasn’t as XS-ive!
  11. Q: Why don’t they have bells in Apple stores anymore? A: Because everyone already knows when an iPhone rings!
  12. Q: What’s the most innovative fruit company? A: Apple, they think different!
  13. Q: What did the detective say when he cracked the case of the stolen iPhone? A: “Hey Siri, it’s case closed!”
  14. Q: Why was the iPad feeling lonely in the Apple store? A: Because all the iPhones were pairing off!
  15. Q: What’s an Apple computer’s favorite snack? A: Microchips!
  16. Q: What do you call an Apple product that takes really good care of itself? A: A Mac-Gyver!

Dad Jokes About Apple: Get Ready to Groan

  1. What does an Apple executive use to dry their clothes? A pair of iDryers.
  2. Why did the Apple product go to the doctor? Because it wasn’t peeling well.
  3. What’s it called when an iPhone falls in love? An iRomance.
  4. My wife told me to take the spider out instead of killing it. So I took it to the Apple store. Now it has a new home and 5G.
  5. What does a tech-savvy farmer grow? Pineapples.
  6. I threw my iPhone at the ground as hard as I could… …it still had no cracks. It turns out it was already broken.
  7. Hey, Dad, can I have an Apple? Sure son, go ask Siri.
  8. I saw a sign that said “Apple Farm.” I thought, “That’s a core business model.”
  9. Why can’t you trust atoms? They make up everything, especially Apple products.
  10. My friend keeps saying “Apple’s logo is a metaphor for knowledge!” I think he’s just eaten too many Apple cores.
  11. What do you call a sad strawberry? A blueberry. What do you call a happy blueberry? An Apple.
  12. What did the dad say when he dropped his phone in the toilet? Well, that sucks.
  13. Why couldn’t the iPad get any sleep? Because it kept having app-mares!
  14. How does an iWatch pay for things? With Apple Pay, duh! It’s like magic, but with technology.
  15. My iPhone is broken, so I’m going to trade it in for a newer model. It’s time for an upgrade…or as I like to call it, an up-byte.
  16. Why are Apple employees such good listeners? Because they’re always wearing AirPods!

Funny Quotes About Apple: That Will Make You Want to Go Bananas

  1. “I tried to explain to my friend the difference between Android and Apple, but he just wouldn’t budge. He’s such a hard-core iFan.”
  2. “My wallet and I had a serious talk about my Apple addiction. It didn’t understand.”
  3. “I just saw an Apple employee polishing a tree. Job security is tough these days.”
  4. “Apple should start making cars. Then they could finally tell us to ‘think different’ about traffic jams.”
  5. “What’s a pirate’s favorite Apple product? The iPatch, of course!”
  6. “My therapist told me to avoid stressful situations. So I stopped watching Apple product launches.”
  7. “Why did the apple go to the party? Because it heard the music was going to be iPod-ing!”
  8. “I’m not saying Apple products are expensive, but I did have to sell a kidney to afford the new charger.”
  9. “My bank account is like an iPhone battery – it goes from 100% to 10% just by looking at it.”
  10. “I’m starting to think Siri is judging my life choices. She’s always giving me that ‘side-eye’ emoji.”
  11. “I’m convinced Apple uses a reverse vacuum cleaner to suck the money out of my bank account.”
  12. “Dating tip: If someone says they don’t have their phone with them, it’s definitely an Android. No one leaves home without their iPhone.”
  13. “Apple should rename the Genius Bar to the ‘We’re not sure what’s wrong either, but we’ll charge you $100 to look at it’ Bar.”
  14. “You know you’re addicted to Apple when you start naming your children after software updates.”
  15. “I’m not saying I’m clumsy, but I’ve dropped my iPhone so many times, Siri has developed a stutter.”
  16. “I’m convinced the ‘Find My iPhone’ app is really just Apple’s way of keeping tabs on us.”
  17. “Apple: We think different. Also Apple: Buy our new phone. It’s basically the same as the old one but with a slightly better camera.”

Funny Proverbs & Wise Sayings about Apple: A Core Collection of Humor

  1. An Apple a day keeps anyone away if you throw it hard enough. (Classic proverb with a mischievous twist)
  2. The early bird gets the worm, but the patient one gets the new iPhone. (Modern tech spin on an old saying)
  3. Don’t judge an Apple by its skin, especially the scratched-up ones in the bargain bin. (Humorous take on judging appearances)
  4. A rotten Apple in the cart spoils the whole Apple ecosystem. (Playful jab at brand loyalty)
  5. Give a man an Apple, and he’ll eat for a day. Teach a man to use an Apple product, and he’ll empty his wallet for a lifetime. (Humorous commentary on Apple pricing)
  6. The pen is mightier than the sword, but the Apple Pencil is mightier than both… and more expensive. (Poking fun at the high cost of accessories)
  7. Two wrongs don’t make a right, but two Apple failures make a Samsung user chuckle. (Playful rivalry between brands)
  8. If life gives you lemons, trade them for an Apple. Everyone knows they hold their resale value better. (Tongue-in-cheek advice on prioritizing value)
  9. Rome wasn’t built in a day, but it could have been downloaded faster with a stable internet connection. (Modern tech humor meets historical fact)
  10. Don’t bite the hand that feeds you, unless it’s offering you a green Apple. Demand a different color. (Silly and specific for added humor)
  11. All that glitters is not gold, but it might be a new iPhone release. (Playing on the excitement around new Apple products)
  12. A penny saved is a penny earned, unless it’s towards a new MacBook, then it’s just a drop in the ocean. (Humorously highlighting the perceived high cost of Apple products)
  13. Good things come to those who wait, but the new Apple Watch is available for pre-order now! (A playful encouragement for instant gratification)
  14. You can’t have your Apple and eat it too, especially if you forget to charge it. (A pun-filled reminder about battery life)
  15. The grass is always greener on the other side, especially if they’re using the new iPhone camera filters. (Poking fun at social media and tech envy)

Apple Double Entendres Puns: Gettin’ Fruity With the English Language

  1. “I’m not saying the apple pie contest was rigged, but the winner’s crust was definitely connected.” (Implying cheating/a delicious crust)
  2. “This apple crumble is the core of my existence.” (Essential/about the fruit)
  3. “You’ve got to be the apple of your own pie.” (Love yourself/be the best part of your creation)
  4. “He was caught red-handed trying to steal an apple. They threw the book at him, but it bounced off his Granny Smith.” (Type of apple/tough skin)
  5. “My doctor told me to eat an apple a day. Now I’m the apple of my doctor’s eye.” (Healthy/favorite patient)
  6. “She’s got a chip on her shoulder and a worm in her apple.” (Holding a grudge/a literal wormy apple)
  7. “The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree, unless it’s being thrown at someone.” (Family resemblance/apple projectiles)
  8. “I tried to explain the concept of an Apple ecosystem, but it fell on deaf ears.” (Apple products/ignorance)
  9. “Dating app profiles are like apples: You’ve got to swipe through a lot of bad ones to find a good one.” (Online dating/fruit selection)
  10. I went to an apple orchard and all I got was this lousy t-shirt…and a bushel of delicious apples.” (Tourist trap/fruit haul)
  11. “I’m starting to think this whole “an apple a day keeps the doctor away” thing is just a big conspiracy by Big Apple.” (Health advice/fruit industry)
  12. “They say an apple a day keeps the doctor away. But I ate a whole pie and now I have a tummy ache. Guess I need to call the doctor!” (Overindulgence/ironic outcome)
  13. “Love is like an apple: Sweet and juicy, but with a core that can be a bit tough to swallow.” (Romance/reality of relationships)
  14. “Don’t worry about that mistake. We all have our bad apples.” (Human error/rotten fruit)
  15. “Life is short, eat dessert first! Especially if it’s apple pie.” (Indulgence/delicious priorities)
  16. “He’s the Big Apple of my eye.” (Important person/New York City reference)
  17. “I tried to resist the apple pie, but it was calling my name…and whispering “à la mode”.” (Temptation/ice cream pairing)

Recursive Puns About Apple: Prepare to Get Cored Away With Laughter

  1. Why did the recursive function go to the Apple store? To byte into a new loop! 😂
  2. What’s an Apple engineer’s favorite type of fruit basket? One with a base case-nana! 🍌
  3. Why did Apple create a self-referential operating system? They heard it was the core of the problem! 🍎
  4. What’s an Apple programmer’s favorite snack? Recursion rings! 💍
  5. How do you fix a broken Apple pun? You use a pair o’ functions! 🍐
  6. Why did the Apple Watch break up with the iPhone? It said their relationship was too app-dependent! 💔
  7. What’s the most recursive fruit in the world? The Apple-ception! 🤯
  8. How do you make an Apple crumble? You push it down the iOS upgrade path! crumble! 🥧
  9. Why did the Apple fall from the tree? Because it was tired of being the root of all problems! 🌳
  10. What’s an Apple’s favorite type of music? Anything with a catchy re-fruit-ain! 🎶
  11. Why did the Apple refuse to go to school? It said it already had a core curriculum! 📚
  12. How do you find a lost Apple product? You use the “Find My Recursion” app! 🔍
  13. What do you get when you mix an Apple with a pomegranate? A fruit salad that never ends… it just keeps seeding itself! 🥗
  14. Why are Apple products so good at hiding? They’re experts at going incognito… or should I say, “in-App-nito”! 🕵️‍♀️
  15. Why did the Apple go to therapy? It had too many core issues! 🧠

Funny Apple Tom Swifties – Jokes and Puns: Get Ready to Groan with Laughter!

  1. “This apple pie is delicious!” Tom said sweetly.
  2. “I just bought ten pounds of apples!” Tom said remotely.
  3. “These apple seeds are bitter!” Tom spitted.
  4. “My favorite part of an apple is the peel,” Tom said skin-cerely.
  5. “I dropped the apple pie!” Tom said crustfallen.
  6. “Don’t you dare take another bite of my apple pie!” Tom said pie-vously.
  7. “This apple orchard is enormous!” Tom said broadly.
  8. “This caramel apple is really sticky,” Tom said gooily.
  9. “Did you try this apple cider?” Tom asked pressingly.
  10. “I just love apple picking season!” Tom said orchard-ly.
  11. “These apple slices are perfectly thin,” Tom said slyly.
  12. “I’m going to plant an apple seed,” Tom said core-fully.
  13. “This apple is rotten!” Tom said badly.
  14. “This is the best apple pie I’ve ever had!” Tom exclaimed appley-ever-after.
  15. “Watch out, that apple looks like it’s about to fall,” Tom warned gravely.
  16. “I think I ate too many apple fritters,” Tom said dough-fully.
  17. “Pass the apple butter,” Tom said smoothly.

Apple Spoonerisms: Where Bites Get Tongued-Tied

  1. “I need to pace my hone!” (Replace my phone)
  2. “Did you get the new Apps Pro?” (Apps Pro instead of iPad Pro)
  3. “Siri, can you plea the nusic?” (Play the music)
  4. “This app is a real pine waster!” (Time waster)
  5. “Just a cew hlicks and you’re done!” (Few clicks)
  6. “Welcome to the Snapple tore!” (Apple Store)
  7. “I love the new MacBoot Pro.” (MacBook Pro)
  8. “Have you tried the new Apple Gatch?” (Apple Watch)
  9. “My phone is stuck on the Papple Sogo.” (Apple logo)
  10. “I need to iPair my Bluetooths.” (Repair my Bluetooth)
  11. “The battery life on this thing is a load of bunk!” (A load of junk)
  12. “This new feature is stot the show!” (Hot the show)
  13. “I hate it when my phone craps out.” (Slaps out)
  14. “Check out my new TonePods!” (AirPods)
  15. “This update is taking pyond age!” (Beyond age)
  16. “I can’t stand slow Wi-Hi-Fi.” (Slow Wi-Fi)
  17. “My phone bill this month? A total hone bonker!” (Phone bonker instead of bone shocker)

That’s All Folks! Apple-lutely Hilarious, Right?

We hope these apple puns and jokes have tickled your funny bone and given you a real core memory! But don’t stop there! We’re not peeling out just yet. Explore our website for a bushel of other hilarious puns and jokes that will have you laughing all the way to the orchard.

Sarah Ejaz - Creator and Founder of online space ThePunnyWorld.com, a place of endless humor with fresh jokes and puns.

About the Author: Sarah Ejaz

I, Sarah Ejaz, am the creative force behind ThePunnyWorld.com, your premier destination for chuckles and chortles. With my expertise in English Literature and extensive experience as a freelance creative writer, I craft jokes and puns that light up your day. Explore our world for your daily dose of humor, and let the good times roll! Find and read here my Best Puns.

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